The Hidden Pain Behind Childlessness and Risky Treatments 

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It had been three years since our marriage as of this morning. So I went to the doctor and started treatment because we hadn’t had any children yet. For six months, Baba Jaan, I went through treatment—and then changes started happening in my body to the extent that the doctor said, “You may develop cancer. We need to stop this hormone-based treatment.” Even though the treatment was having some effect, every month the doctor would say, “Everything looks fine—what’s the issue? Why aren’t you conceiving?” And I kept going through it… but eventually, we had to stop. So yes, the treatment existed, it was seemingly working—but I couldn’t continue with it. And then, Baba Jaan, when I called you, you said something that stayed with me: “We cannot risk losing our daughter for the sake of a desire.” And Baba Jaan, not even once did a negative thought enter my mind. Never. And that, truly, is His mercy—that not even a shadow of doubt or bad assumption ever arose in my heart.

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